[The Lunch Table] Dubai Chocolate Syndrome: When You Try to Be Everything at Once

Episode 3 takes us to an unforgettable summer: programs/internships, jobs, and the numerous Dubai chocolate variations. Just like how Dubai chocolate is “reinvented,” students feel that same pressure to constantly “reinvent” themselves to match up with their peers.

Host Favour Ajayi explores how this challenge deeply resonates with QHSS students, who are struggling with their perception of productivity and debating on what’s better: participating in a prestigious internship or working in their local service jobs. Featured guests Eric Li and Wafi Sharif, juniors at QHSS, share reflections on their summer breaks, share their perspectives on this debate, and offer advice on how QHSS students can handle the unspoken pressure to succeed.

Below is a transcript of the podcast episode:

Favour

Welcome to The Lunch Table, I’m your host Favour Ajayi.

Welcome back to the third episode of the Lunch Table! It’s a new year meaning more problems and more advice coming your way.

Lunch is in session, let’s see what’s on the menu for today’s episode.

Favour

To keep anonymity, let’s call our submitter Jenna. Let’s see what Jenna has to say.

“I just started school, and it seems like everyone around has some sort of idea that they want to do currently. Everyone has something interesting that they did over the summer, but I haven’t done anything that’s worth sharing or impressive. I’m worried that I’m falling behind. Should I feel worried that I haven’t done anything this past summer to improve myself?”

Before you even notice, summer ends as quickly as it starts. It’s not uncommon to feel as if you haven’t done anything.

Favour

In this day and age, it is often expected or seen as the norm for high school students to do something productive during the summer. Many students feel the need to work or participate in programs rather than just doing nothing. According to a new Pew Research Center analysis of Bureau of Labor Statistics Data, teens ages 15 to 17 are committing more of their time in the summer to educational activities and less time to leisure.

Therefore, to help solve Jenna’s dilemma, a few friends have invited me to their lunch table. Let’s see what they have to say!

Favour

Hi, I would like to welcome our guests: Eric and Wafi!

Eric

Hello everyone, I’m Eric. I’m a junior here, I kind of failed my bio test today, but I think it’s fine because I’m here…I’m here and that makes me happy.

Wafi

Hello, I’m Wafi. I’m also a junior. I did not fail my bio test, but I’m glad to be here because I’m interested to hear what’s going on.

Favour

Ok, how does it feel to be back in school? Did you guys do anything fun over summer?

Eric

I had no fun over the summer; I was trapped outside everyday in the sweltering heat. I might’ve gotten a heat stroke a few times. The good thing is I did make a little bit of money, so that’s pretty nice.

Wafi

Yea, glad to be back at school, I’m glad to see Eric’s face again. Summer was pretty good too…well not really ‘cause I did work all day, but I got a lot of money too

Favour

Yea same for me, I had some fun. I did a program, were you at the consortium?

Eric

Yes, yes, at the consortium, right.

Favour
You guys were all there? Yea I saw Julia, I saw Kripa, I saw Victoria; I saw a lot of people there. That was pretty fun.

Speaking of summer, I know we all saw a lot about dubai chocolate over the past few months. Have you seen all the different dubai chocolate variations, I’m talking the dubai chocolate covered strawberries, dubai chocolate shake shack drink, dubai chocolate matcha…? What are your thoughts on that?

Eric

I’ve actually never had dubai chocolate before, how much does it cost?

Favour

I don’t know, I’ve never had it.

Eric

Oh, you’ve never had it either?

Favour

Both of you are very accomplished, what made you want to start applying yourself more in your academic journey outside of school?

Wafi

I mean, obviously we’re in a specialized high school, and everyone is really caught up in getting into a good college, so I guess that kind of influences me to seek stuff to do outside of school because you need to get involved outside of school, there’s no other way to pursue your interests.

Eric

I’ll just say my background, so growing up I developed this ethnic of working hard, looking up to my parents. They work hard so anytime I’m in school, whether it’s middle school or elementary school, it’s always working hard, doing stuff outside of school. I feel like once you get into high school, the amount of doors you open through these afterschool activities is a lot because when you’re in middle school or elementary school, there’s not a lot of programs for you besides afterschool. You go there, eat some snacks, play a few games and activities, but in high school you can apply for many more things, there’s so many more opportunities to explore yourself. That, and being able to develop myself more, like I actually recognize my passions that allowed me to pursue my interests more, but…was there another part to your question?

Favour

No, that was it!

Eric

Okay.

Favour

I totally agree with both of you. As a child of immigrant parents, I feel like it’s very important for us to apply ourselves more, to pursue things other than our schoolwork because we have to be well-rounded individuals. One thing that’s really great about our school is that everybody, whether that’s a student or a teacher, is always talking about extracurriculars or classes or stuff that you should be doing, so you have an opportunity to take some stuff outside of school and explore yourself more as a person.

There has been debate that doing prestigious internships may seem inessential and less valuable than working in a traditional service job. What are your thoughts?

Eric

Alright, so one thing I want to make clear: at the end of the day, everybody has their own path and values. My parents work at a restaurant. I’ve been helping out at the restaurant since I was in sixth grade, and ultimately I feel like whether I’m doing research or some prestigious research program that accepts a few hundred people around the country every year or working at your parent’s restaurant, both of them are the same. If you ask me, I’d actually argue that [working at] my parent’s restaurant is better because at the end of the day I get to help my family, I feel more proud at my restaurant and I’m able to see what my parents are able to accomplish in the past 20 years of owning a restaurant. I feel like that is more important than research. At the end of the day, it’s really what matters to you, not what matters to everybody else because everybody else might have different views, but it’s not your’s, so what matters is what you like, what you value. Then based on that, you can decide which one’s better for you.

Wafi

Good point Eric, I agree with you completely, but I also want to say, just like how it’s valid to be proud of working at your parent’s restaurant, when you’re doing an internship, it gives you a sense of accomplishment know that you’re in a whole lab doing stuff that high schoolers our age don’t do typically. While day-to-day jobs and internships are both very valuable as they give you many insights into whatever field you might be going into, for me personally the internship route is a lot more satisfying.

Favour

Do you think you learned any meaningful life skills through your internship or enrichment programs you participated in?

Wafi

Many because two things…actually let me go on a side tangent. The most important thing I gained [is] the guy who won the Nobel prize in Chemistry for 2025: he was my associate mentor. I built that connection with him, and if I were to get a rec letter from him that’d be insane. Like a rec letter from a nobel prize winner. Other than that, speaking interpersonally, I think I learned a lot of work ethic because I was in the lab 9-5 everyday, 5 days a week. There was a lot of work, but eventually it paid off because I was able to see my poster, get my money, and build that research experience that not many highschoolers have.

Eric

Wow Wafi, it seems like you had a really eventful summer. I’d say being able to meet new people, being able to expand my networking [and] interact with people. When I’m outside, doing research in the community of science, I see everybody, asians, whites, hispanics, all different areas, up in the Bronx, Manhattan, down in Brooklyn, down in 8th Avenue [and] Far Rockaway. Being able to meet different cultures, meet different people, and just be able to talk to them. That human [and] social interaction is very important; it’s very fulfilling.

Favour

Welcome to the Lunch Table. I’m your host Favour Ajayi. It’s a new school year, meaning more memories but also more hurdles and challenges. Don’t worry, because The Lunch Table has got you! Feel free to share any concerns through our google form on The Cardinal Chronicles. You can remain 100% anonymous.

Favour

Have you guys worked in a service job, working at a restaurant, grocery stores, I know Eric talked about that, and how do you compare that to the things you did this past summer?

Eric

Working in the restaurant is completely different [from the internship]. When I’m in the lab, I use more of my academics: you plan, you do calculations, and then when you go to the restaurant, it’s more fast-paced, it’s more pressure.

When you’re in the restaurant, maybe you’re thinking about, “which orders should I make?” “how should I serve the customer?” “how should I resolve the dispute between the customer if the customer says the food tastes bad, if something’s dirty” Versus in the lab, you’re probably calculating molarity, doing some scientific experiment. It’s just completely different things, but I feel like both are very important. Critical thinking in the lab versus being able to work under pressure in a service establishment

Wafi

Same here, I agree with Eric. Before I entered high school, my dad had a friend who runs a restaurant next to my house, so he hooked me up there. I used to work there for a while. Eric’s right, it’s very fast-paced, the restaurant environment, but I believe that it’s very useful too because beyond however much of a scientist you may be, you’re still a person, you gotta learn those kinds of skills too. You can’t just be good at science and nothing else, you’ve got to have interpersonal skills as well as being good at academic subjects.

Favour

I’ve personally never worked at a service job, but I know that my mom had her own job in Nigeria, and when I was younger I would be with her [so] I know how fast-paced that was and how stressed she was because she’s cooking and selling.

Another question I have is: have you ever felt the need to reinvent yourself based on how you’ve viewed others?

Wafi

Yeah, like when I first entered my internship, over the summer, like my lab partner. He was really smart. He’s really a lot, like, tapped into what we were doing. And, so was I, that’s why I got into a lab in the first place, but I feel like having that kind of passion, like the passion that he did, and being able to show it through your personality, it was like a really useful skill. So I kind of adapted to that as I hung out with him more through the summer and, I think he really rubbed off on me, which was a good thing. I’d say ultimately.

Eric

Wow, that’s a very good question Favour. It’s very reflective thinking about it. It’s very often you get influenced by the external, you know, the external environment, the people that you interact with. So yeah, quite often, coming into the school, there’s just unspoken pressure to succeed [and] do a bunch of these internships, get good grades. So I do feel like it’s sometimes harmful in a way, but at the same time, you need to realize that everybody has a different path in life. And, you pick your own path, and you shouldn’t let anybody else tell you what to do.

But even then, some encouragement from others, the influence from the external environment is nice, right. You just have to make sure it’s in a healthy dosage and beneficial for you and not harming you.

Favour

Do you think the need to reinvent yourself is entirely a positive thing to do, or is it entirely negative, or do you feel like it’s in the middle?

Eric

It really depends on the person, like what it is. Sometimes reinventing yourself is good, right? It makes you a better person. For example, if you were like a bad student and you felt this pressure to succeed, you’re being encouraged by others to succeed, right? But at the same time, you know, you could be like a good student, and [there’s a] high pressure environment.

So it’s very important to be able to choose what affects you and what doesn’t. If it’s something affecting you that might be bad in the long run, then it’s bad in that case, right? But if it’s something good, such as [encouragement] makes you a better person, then that would be good for you.

So it’s really in the middle, and it really depends.

Wafi

Yeah. Same thoughts. Reinventing yourself depends on who you are. I feel like we’re surrounded by people every day who have some aspect to them that’s got to be good, right? It’s always better. It is best to take those things away from those people you meet every day, but also completely reinventing yourself is like, you know, it might cross a few lines.

It depends who you are and what you want to make yourself out to be. Otherwise, there’s not really any need to do much about it. You can just, you know, be yourself.

Favour

So, finally, what advice would you give Jenna who feels as if she is falling behind?

Eric

Jenna, at the end of the day, it’s just important to stay true to yourself, right? Ask yourself, what do you want to do? What do you want to do in life? Right? Actually, no, that’s not even true. Because technically you don’t. You’re only in high school. You don’t need to know, like, what you want to do yet.

But at the end of the day, you know, just live life, you know, just live life happily, right? Whatever makes you happy. If something interests you, for example, you know, you’re taking a bunch of science classes. The school is for science, right? Maybe you’re interested in playing an instrument, you know, in that case, join Music Makers if you like to act join QHSS Act! Or like whatever, whatever interests you, right? Don’t go based on what your peers are doing.

Your peers might say, “Oh, this club is bad because it doesn’t help you in the field of science,” or “Music Makers is bad because it doesn’t help you, be a better scientist.” At the end of the day, what do you want to be right? [If] you don’t want to be a scientist in this, okay?

Don’t let other people you know, tell you otherwise or, like, try to influence you. Right? If other people are getting to this really good internship, that’s great. That’s good for them. But that doesn’t mean you need to as well. Everybody walks a different path in life and all the timelines are different. So don’t stress too much about it.

Wafi

Yeah, I think it’s just a step away from all the pressure for a bit. You know, I know we’re in a specialized high school, so the pressure is a lot compared to whatever else other people might be. But also, the fact that you feel like you’re behind, it doesn’t mean much because you’re a high school junior and, technically to some extent, we’re all behind you if you put yourself and if you’re comparing yourself to others.

For example, there’s probably some 11 year olds who are like PhD students, but obviously none of us here do. So if you put it that way, you know technically we’re all behind. But you finally got to be yourself and focus on making yourself be the best person you can be because not everyone you know, not everyone is built the same and like, everyone has different standards. So you might need to step away from the comparison and just let yourself be.

Favour

Yeah. And just remember that you don’t always have time like you’re noticing this stuff now, so you can take this time to reflect and do stuff to change that.

Favour

Thank you for being on today’s podcast, and I hope Jenna, whoever you are, that you get help from this.

Eric

It was a pleasure.

Wafi

Thank you for having us.

Favour

And that concludes The Lunch Table. The Lunch Table is The Cardinal Chronicle’s podcast-style advice column, where the people of QHSS can submit their entries asking for advice on anything. Struggling in a class, friendship, drama or holiday dilemmas: feel free to share whatever has been on your mind.

This was produced by Joyce Lin and Favour Ajayi.

This is your host Favour Ajayi, signing off.